Sunday, August 23, 2015

Good morning and Hello! I’m on a Scales of Ma’at slope today – I woke up and knew it would be a Scales of Ma’at day, and even knew what (surprising) deck I should use – hinting at what’s just around the corner, Autumn and it’s great festivals of Samhain &/or Hallowe’en, the Wicker Man has been burnt, (did anyone know the chosen this year?), and round off the Autumn with the harvest festival of an American Thanksgiving, complete with smallpox blankets and wagonloads of crude poisoned spirits to throw to the immigrants arriving by the thousands on northern Mediterranean shores, fleeing the violence elsewhere around the basin. It isn’t really THAT bad, but the European welcome mat is decidedly of short fiber & shrift. At any rate, I wanted a heart/cosmos reading today, something along the lines of, “My heart is SO up & down lately, my intuition is hot or cold, my ‘emotions of the heart’ like compassion, empathy, love and brotherhood of the soul are ALL out of whack, veering crazily around the accretion disk of  the black hole of my mystification. I’m a creature that breathes *Control,* so when things are this galactically comparable to Mussorgsky’s *Night on Bald Mountain,* something’s fucked up. Help me out here.” Well, I got the draw I needed to see just as I drew it; meaning that I knew it was dead right-on. The 10 of Wands and III the Empress. Please remember that on the Scales of Ma’at, your heart is placed in the left balancing tray and weighed against the feather of Truth by Ma’at, Goddess of Equilibrium, Justice, and Well-being Through Order & Truth. (Today’s deck is *The Bohemian Gothic Tarot* by Alexander Ukolov & Karen Mahoney.  It is a gorgeous, decadent deck, and hard to find now, I understand. If you run across a copy, snap it up. You may come to appreciate it! There is an app, too, I’m told.) So there I trudge, my sack of sticks on my back, through the deceptive darkness, eh? Well, mayhap I have a load of care & concerns that I am to shoulder until Judgment Day or I decide to unburden myself, but they are getting lighter all the time. The key was my mother’s death – I didn’t mourn, not out of lack of feeling or hate, but out of belief that there was nothing TO mourn. She had lived a very full life, had been able to see all of her plans come to fruition, and left with a great feeling of accomplishment & satisfaction in a job well done. Everyone was so torn up with their own grief they never noticed the lack of mine. That was the log that started the spectacular highway wreck. With it loose, the others couldn’t maintain form, and slowly but inevitably, and with ever increasing speed, rolled off of my back and into incoming traffic. It was a MAGNIFICENT pile-up! I think this card, this 10, refers to another set of sticks I may be carrying, quite unconsciously, and I am ashamed to admit it – the need to be psychically in control and able to decide the fate of the sticks which I carry. That figure in the dark, with the 10 sticks, don’t forget he’s had the guts and intelligence to make it all the way to here, the 10 of Wands, so he isn’t stupid. Nor am I. We’ll let go of these sticks together, too, and yes, we shall shed the tears of fathers watching their children walk away, but that will be right. And the Feather of Truth in all of this? Why, II the Empress, of course! Whose cornucopia of fertility and goodness and health and fruitfulness and all of the ripe joys of life shall be openly shared with me to encourage me in my task of becoming the unburdened Man? The Empress, number III, with her large Bohemian goodness and rather creepy transvestite princelet at her side. (Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.) OR in this case, the man behind the mirror, because it is certainly a FASCINATING depiction of happy domestic felicity, isn’t it? Actually, it is very close in spirit to a LOT of my jokes, which often have a macabre element to them, and I am comfortable with him in the picture because he is a kind of future me, or perhaps more accurately, the CURRENT me, waiting to be clothed in my new raiment of golden crystals and citrine silk (personal favorites – choose your own color scheme). The placement of the cards gives me reason to believe that I’m taking my burden to the Empress, and that her happy little triumvirate will help me to sort out the chaff from the wheat, or the gold from the straw, or the Truth from the shit. I can certainly hope so, and with good reason; my anima, now restored to her rightful throne (somewhere to the right and slightly behind mine) is running through her archetypes as quickly as she can trip the Light Fantastic, because A) mainly she is having fun, and more seriously, B) she has to play catch up a little, not much, to ride her palfrey comfortably alongside my destrier. I wanted to love and marry a generous, rich & loving woman and I have struck the jackpot here in the Spheres. SO – I’m going to throw off this shabby cloak that hides my true nature at the next turn, and enter openly into the Light with my Empress. Bring your shades, our beauty may blind you.    

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