Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at reading for 02 Sep 2015 (despite what the Blog service notes; it is based on the west coast of the U.S.A.) Today I have drawn the Ace of Wands reversed for the left-hand scale and the 8 of Coins for the right-hand side, or Feather of Truth of Ma’at against which my “heart” is being weighed. The myth is that if my heart proves to be heavier than the Feather of Truth, my soul is thrown to Ammit, the Great Beast and Devourer, the Bone-Eater. She looks rather like a cross between a lion, a hippopotamus and a crocodile and given the ecosystem of the ancient Egyptians, totally understandable! So, to my generalized question of “Guidance for today, please?” I received this answer, and it makes perfect sense to me, as well. (I had wanted to dive in and use my new *Tabula Mundi Tarot* by M. M. Meleen every day for the immediate future, I am so taken with the deck; we “grok” each other, the deck speaks to me, crystalline & clear. Today, however, the deck is *The Fountain Tarot* by J. Saiz, J. Gruhl & Andi Todaro, because on 2nd and better thought I decided NOT to overdose, to ADD Moderation [as I am SO often being told by XIV!] and thus to at least use a different, more “intuitional” deck every other day so that I don’t bog myself down in the “science” of all that Golden Dawn/Thoth/Crowley-ana. *The Fountain Tarot* is, quite simply, superb.) So, on to the hunt! The Ace of Wands reversed isn’t exactly what I had wanted to see this morning, but it has the virtue of being true; I feel a “dull motivation, as if plans have been thwarted, or having a lazy spirit and anxious with uncertainty,” to paraphrase the deck’s LWB. This is not because I am so paralyzed with Fear that I fear to move; I read this today and I KNOW it means the effect of age on my spirit. Whether I like to admit it or not, the Fire of my youth is long-banked, and the embers, though still alive & life-giving, have ceased their dancing, happy chaos of Youth aflame. Age and experience have added caution to my spirit, though I do believe not overcautious. Right now I feel just a bit physically-energetically down, but with my obsession (yes, it IS that) with the Tarot stronger, deeper, wider and more sincere than ever, my desire to continue the Path to the end remains undiminished; yes, I remain all that, too. Tired, not sleeping well (for which I blame the “psychic tsunami,” as it isn’t leaving me obliterated, just drained in other areas from having to devote SO much attention to the growth I am experiencing and need to be channeling,) and out of sorts, but basically whole and waiting for the “new stuff” to settle in comfortably. This is more adequately represented, I feel, in the Feather card, the 8 of Coins. I am an artist at work, constructing MY chef d’oeuvre. “Shifting from competence to mastery using diligence and extreme focus, I remain open to learning and proud of not only my work but my self-discovery. . .” to paraphrase, again, the LWB of *The Fountain Tarot*.  And that IS how I feel, as I go deeper and deeper into the esoteric and my study of the Tarot. I decided some time ago not to scatter myself, as I usually do, over the wide field of divination & oracular decision, but to remain within the structure of the Tarot with its’ associates, the Kabbalah and Astrology. (There are others, such as Gematria, but the sense is there.) I am here, every day, with myself, my cards and whatever material I wish to cover and I don’t plan to alter that other than to deepen it and my commitment to my own spiritual flowering and transformation. In other words, I’ll give this up when “they take the Tarot cards from my cold, dead hands.”  


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